I finally woke up and started releasing good music.
the news
This was a song I started writing in March 2023 and immediately knew it was going to be my new best song for a while. The night I got the idea for it, my friend was telling me how music can be used to express honesty about things you would otherwise never say. This was something I thought about a lot at the time, and this song really helped me get over it. I really focused on making the production the best it could be, making around 5 different versions of it. I'd still say it sounds pretty good for what I was going for, so it was worth it.
My friends were messing around on a Discord call one night, one of them was talking about personal life experiences, the other was creating random stacks on Splice and rapping over them. Eventually the line 'i don't wanna ask her though' came up, and I heard my friend rapping 'i don't wanna ask, i don't wanna ask her' over this random beat. I thought it could be a pretty interesting song, so I added a melody to the chords we had and the rest just fell into place. That's still a very fun memory for me, because it's the only song I wrote with both of them on a call like that.
'I'm excited for the future, but I'm caught up in the past' really says a lot about me. 'You were my world, maybe I was yours' ended up being the defining line of the EP, and it really describes how I felt about this person. They kept me going for a period in my life, and they probably don't even know that. And it probably wouldn't have been anything at all, but you still think of them when things aren't going well, where would you be if they were still in your life. I wish the mixing of the guitar at the start was better, but I still really love this song.
I love the idea of this song, the 'Please let me know if I'm wasting my time' into 'Don't let him find out he's wasting his time' is so cool to me. If someone was willing to cheat on you, then what's stopping them from doing it to somebody else.
The 'dream I had' was originally meant as a coping mechanism, while all that I talk about was actually real. But I don't mind the other meaning at all, where it is only a dream and just something you're scared of. Both of those work really well with this song. 'I don't wanna know more' into 'I don't matter no more' is also a very nice change at the end.